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Mitt Romney Said WHAT?!

"I believe in an America where millions of Americans believe in an America that’s the America millions of Americans believe in. That’s the America I love.'


see also: the first rule of tautology club
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posted by Left Action on facebook:

The Iowa Caucuses will be decided in the next few hours. Anyone want to make predictions for who will win?

I predict it will either be the crazy one, the stupid one, the lying one, or the crazy, stupid, lying one.
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[ profile] liddle_oldman posted from The Band Played Waltzing Matilda, which reminded my it was Memorial Day Weekend (when Jim is home for multiple days, I never know what day it is)

I thought I would share this one from Flanders and Swann - one of their few serious pieces, but it doesn't get much more real. And all the more depressing for being about as old as I am.
(Click the title to download)

Twenty Tons of TNT

lyrics )
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Jim sent me this, and I repeat it here for Robin and Terry

An interesting note from the homeland security world.

Subject: airport security
Their number's up!

At New York's Kennedy airport today, an individual later discovered to be a
public school teacher was arrested trying to board a flight while in
possession of a ruler, a protractor, a setsquare, a slide rule, and a

At a morning press conference, Attorney general John Ashcroft said he
believes the man is a member of the notorious Al-gebra movement. He is being
charged by the FBI with carrying weapons of math instruction.

"Al-gebra is a fearsome cult," Ashcroft said. "They desire average solutions
by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on tangents in a search of
absolute value. They use secret code names like "x" and "y"
and refer to themselves as "unknowns", but we have determined they belong to
a common denominator of the axis of medieval with coordinates in every

"As the Greek philanderer Isosceles used to say, there are 3 sides to every
triangle," Ashcroft declared.

When asked to comment on the arrest, President Bush said, "If God had wanted
us to have better weapons of math instruction, He would have given us more
fingers and toes.

"I am gratified that our government has given us a sine that it is intent on
protracting us from these math-dogs who are willing to disintegrate us with
calculus disregard. Murky statisticians love to inflict plane on every
sphere of influence," the President said, adding: "Under the circumferences,
we must differentiate their root, make our point, and draw the line."

President Bush warned, "These weapons of math instruction have the potential
to decimal everything in their math on a scalene never before seen unless we
become exponents of a Higher Power and begin to factor-in random facts of

Attorney General Ashcroft said, "As our Great Leader would say, read my
ellipse. Here is one principle he is uncertainty of: though they continue to
multiply, their days are numbered as the hypotenuse tightens.


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March 2012

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